Random thoughts on...

Generally I know I have been a fuglisian(read: fat ugly asian) for bumming around and doing absolute nothing to better myself or to contribute something positive/useful to the world during this almost 1 month sem break. I mean I'd planned a lot of stuffs for myself to do or start on during the sem break but looking back, indeed there has been nada and complete slacking throughout a whole freaking month. A month? What happened to Spanish/French class? Batik competition(not entirely slacking tho, tak cukup resources and the process cost a bomb!), charitable work, etc etc???

I mean the least I could have done was to read the still-in-bookstores-good-quality-unopened interior books I have bought and piled for the past 6 months. At least improve my very much cacated technical drawings kan(why do I have to do technicals???). Or instead of storing it in my mind and knowing that it will all slipped away and vanished by the very second i do something else, sit down and list all possible ideas and sketching then to life. That is was good designers should be doing right?

Instead I stuffed myself with McD for 3 meals(yeap, did it yesterday) or shop like nobody business. I mean who buys 6 white tees in 5 days for no apparent reasons except for fashion fetish???(yes people, I am addicted to white V neck tees) Well except rich designers of course. But I am not even up to par with those designers, and they bought their stuffs with their own ridiculously overcharged fees hard earn money kan... Unlike me who splurged on clothes like crazy but if you noticed, and you don't have to look hard enough, the visibility of my dad's wrinkles has mysteriously double... *matila kena sumpah anak durhaka... I seriously need to cut down on spendings. But that means no more 3 meals a week in Paddington's. *noooo....

Anyhoo, I am kinda excited la the holidays is going to be over soon. Well yes I do (sheepishly) admit that I am all for another month of hols, but I think it's high time to go back and do some creative thinking and work on to improve myself to be closer to achiving the "designer" status.

But during the break and previous semester, I have been doing a lot of thinking on whether I have chosen the right course. I know I know most of you by now would be like 'what?' or 'drama....' but seriously I realized the I have been so focussed to be an Interior Architect since like Form 1 and now, the fire kinda like... how do I put it... erm, almost "burned out"? I know its a little odd kan coz I know that all my life I have dedicate, prepared and equipped myself with "decent" knowledge for interior design, so that at least I wont be a lost cat when I enter college, but nothing prepares me for the real s***.

I felt so oppressed for the past year la. In college I feel like we are not free enough to explore things on our own... I mean forget the practicality and 'how you gonna f***ing built this bull shit' for a while, and just take a look at the ideas and at least apprecite them, if not nurture them to be better kan? And there is some lecturers who still doesnt embrace the technology. And of coz the plain favoritism thingy. Urgh.

But lately I've been thinking a lot about fashion design. But I still love doing interior... Or maybe foundation year in One Academy.
Decisions, decisions....